& Silence Declares♥

It is so nice to be home again...

Touched down from the plane about 70 hours ago...

Last Exercise, the final evaluation!!!

Sapperstar defeated!!!

haha...

Closer to ORD!!!

Will let the photo do the talking when I get them...

Cya~

Silence ;

I be away for 16 days... TO THAILAND, Cresendo trip... Take care of urself everyone!!!

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Have much to say, but no mean of expression... Let silence do its job again...

Silence ;

Time seems to be ticking by at quite a fast speed... Tomorrow will be the day I'm flying off to Thailand for my Cresendo trip... Haven't had the chance to meet out with all my besties yet... Only met up with Chin Wah, Wei Liang, Yoke Leng and Meng Choo (da jie)... As for the rest, look like I will see them 16 days later...

Watched Bee Movie with Chin Wah, Wei Liang and Yoke Leng @ Vivo last night... The movie is totally awesome... Very funny and hilarious... Laugh untill 爆... Very interesting story plot as well... Definitely worth the ticket price... =)

After which, we had our dinner at Harbourfront Food Centre which is located in front of the bus interchange... More jokes along the way as well...

Cliche Pic... Poo Hee is missing... Coz he is in camp...

Three of us trying to act cool... Who is the coolest?
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Got to thank all of them for helping me to take my mind off all my troubles... Cheer up considerablely... Thank...

Learning to let go of matters is not easy.. But I will no doubt my utmost best to achieve it...

Silence ;

Went to Sentosa this morning for my unit's anniversary... Participated 2 games in the inter-coy telematch... Got 1st for one of the games... Felt so proud of everyone in my team and Plant Coy...

Lot of thoughts went through my mind while I was on my way back home... Kinda of being strike by self reflection mode again during that period of time...

Have been wondering whether I'm treating everyone around me equally and with a true heart... Or am I just someone who keeping everyone behind in the things they do???

Which is which??? I'm not so certain anymore...

I hates being alone... And up till now I realise that I'm actually not very popular with people around me... I guess it is my faults cause I tend to be over cautious with who I choose to be friends with... I understand that everyone only need a few close friends...

But due to some strange reasons, I feel that I'm drifting away from my best friends; Edmund, Tracy, Chin Wah, Poo Hee, Wei Liang and Meng Choo...

Maybe what Elson says about is correct... I'm just weak... haha...

(Depression)

Silence ;

"Others before self"

This is a statment that I have believe in eversince young... However, little did I realise that hurts and pains will also be accompanied with the actual practice of this statment...

Have been wondering lately, how many people around me actually appreciate small gestures that others do to them???

I'm still wondering...

Silence ;

Just found a hole in my heart... A hole of loneliness...

心中的空虚，原来他一直都在那里。只是我一直都没有发觉。

还以为我早已经习惯了。可是今天这种感觉又浮现了。有点不知所错。

Sometime, it is really not easy to shake this feeling off... I really hate it when this feeling just appear out of nowhere... It just distracts me from all my thoughts and actions... Feel rather incapacitated now...

Duno when will this feeling go off... Hope it go off soon... I dun wan to affect other with my mood...

hmm...

I got to believe again... Believe and have faith that everything will be fine soon...

My faith will keep me going as usual... My belief will strengthen me...

This crisis will be overcame by me eventually...

I will do it!!!

With the unyielding spirit of my guardian plant: Pinetree

and my guardian animal: Owl...

I will make it!!!

Silence ;

Duno whether is it due to the fact I'm troubled recently or is it because Lao Mu wana test my faith again, it seems that everything around me is going wrong again...

Problems seem to arise one after another.... It is threatening to overwhelm me again... Yet, I dun wish to shaken my own belief and faith...

These 2 words have play a big part in my life so far... I dun wish to lose them at anytime... They are the words that I look upon whenever a storm is brewing straight at me...

However, I'm beginning to doubt myself and these 2 words now... Y isn't it helping me to tide over my situation now?? I need some form of assurance that whatever I do for my family is correct... It isn't easy to be the peacemaker at home... Even a peacemaker need his break from everything that is happening around him....

The current storm that is ongoing at home is worrying me... Yet I have to be away for 16 days starting next Sunday to have my oversea evaluation in Thailand... Wonder how can I leave Singapore with a peace of mind...

Right now I have decided; nothing matters more than my family maybe perhap Lao Mu... Other than that nothing else is impt... Not even relationship...

I just want the storm in my family to settle down now.... Look like I have to work double hard now and brace myself up for the challenge....

I will once again draws strength from my faith and belief... I will not lose this time round coz if I do, I will risk losing everything that is dearest to me forever.... I dun want to see that happening...

and coz

I'm Lawrence Teng!!!

Nothing can strikes me down...

I will calm the storm and bring everything back to normal b4 I leave Singapore....

Silence ;

“家家有本难念的经”

I finally understand it to the full extent today... What will you do if you are struck in between your mum and your dad during their arguement?

I'm beginning to wonder whether I'm a very selfish person?

My mum needs my help to look after my sister, but I have to get my cresendo items today... What should I do?

And just because my mum and dad have just quarrelled, she refuses to ask my dad for help...

Getting caught in the midst of their 'war' 真不好受...

I should be sensible enough to help my mum to look after my sister... Why am I feeling so reluctant to do so? I guess I'm just selfish ba... What difference does it make between me and other unfillial children???

I'm feeling very guilty... It feels as if I have let my mum down....

I will believe in my faith again...

Silence ;

A new self

This week schedule is like so bad... As cresendo is drawing nearer, all the prep training seems to be never-ending.... lol...

Lucky for me coz there is no RT tml at all... So I can at least get a breather for this weekend... And start buying all the items needed for the cresendo...

Almost 爆掉！！！

Now my shoulders and leg going to 烂掉了... haha... Aching quite badly... Hopefully a good night can remove all the aches away...

I'm going to treat whatever that happened to me last week as a nightmare... This way I feel so much better... But I'm still not going to mention anything about it... so please do not ask me regarding this matter...

No matter how sad or frustrated I m, I will always rmb my values in life and continue to have faith in myself....

Coz:

I'm Lawrence Teng!!!

Silence ;