& Silence Declares♥

It been a while again I guess..

Celebrated my mum's birthday with her on Thursday. Went home at 3pm in the afternoon. I'm so glad that I have manage to bake brownie and cake with mum. It was so fun.. Kinda long since I last celebrated my mum's birthday due to university exam. This yr was kinda special coz NTU's exam got pushed back by 1 month. Thus allowing me to spend some special time with mummy.. =D

Something strike me as I was watching mum cut the brownie that night. Due to my carelessness, the top layer of the brownie got burnt. Mummy was cutting away the top layer so that i can bring some back home. She did not keep any of the good part for herself. She took all the slightly burnt part of the brownie and ask me to bring home the rest. It just reminded me that how fortunate I am to have my mum with me and how she has always been trying to guide me and erase my mistakes when I do make 1.

Even though I know my mum wun get to read this, but I just want express here on how much I love her and appreciate her for all her efforts and teachings.

Love u Mum!!! =D

Silence ;

Trying hard in life and to accept everything around me..

I guess I'm not doing a good job at it again.. =(

I'm not perfect, yet I try very hard to be..

Each time I thought I have improve in my character, I'm just being proven wrong.

Who on Earth really understand me?

Silence ;

Gan en that every unhappiness have passed and ended..

Gan en for a brand new chance given each time I made a mistake..

Shall continu to trasure and gan en!!

Silence ;

Went to my first ever Anime Fest today with Zhong Hong, Zhong Yu and Yanda. haha.. It was really cool to see all the live dubbing by the famous Yuri, Hana Kanazawa. WOOT!!! She is fantastic!!! I'm so going to watch angel beat and black rock shooter soon. haha..

However, I also had a small quarrel with Miaosi. It started coz she went to anime fest with her friends in the morning and I'm went with my clique in the afternoon. It was fine at this point. So my clique and I reach the fest at 1.45 with our ticket bought. so we went in for a walk den we went to the concert stage (it was in the exhibition hall next to the main hall). So my phone was in slient mode and I was watching the concert and till now Miaosi did not tell me that she want to see me. So my hp was in slient mode, when I notice her call, I saw her sms too. Couldn't call her back as I was still in the mid of the performance. So i replied her text. She wanted to look for me, so i just told her where i was. and then i continued watching the performance. I didn't know that she duno there was a concert stage that I was in, so she tried calling and I didnt pick up my call as I didn't know it was ringing. So after the performance, I saw all her missed call and I called her back. But then she threw her frustration and temper at me. I didn't say anything about it. I tried explaining but she just never absorbed the info. So I just let her bang her frustration lo.. Kinda my fault that I didn't pick my call. But still I believe I dun deserve having her temper thrown at me. I mean I can't even leave the performance halfway. The concert stage hall door was closed already. And by the time I saw her calls and msges, she was already on her way home. Till now she have not called me or msg me yet. Really duno what she is thinking of.

Shall wait till tml and see how should I settle the issue since she should be slping by now alr.

Overall I did enjoyed myself.. Good night folks!!! Shall continue to study and prep for my activity tml in bxb.

Silence ;

Another fruitful day I guess?

So happy to know that I have the ability to make someone smile and laugh all day.. =D

Just got home from Tzong Hong's place not long ago.. Glad that he enjoyed his simple celebration at home today. =D Nothing beats seeing the smile and laughters of everyone who are close to you. Did not really study much today apart from looking through my physical chem tutorial.

Another wave of mid term marathon is going to start soon. So have to buck up again. Glad that Pok is going finish his O lvl. The same goes for all my beloved Ban yuan. =D The time for enjoyment is going to be here soon for them.

Really glad to be able to learn so much from Tzong Hong and everyone in his family.. Really treasuring this special affinity I have with them. Really Gan en LM for everything. Be it good or bad, I know I have to learn spmething at the end of the day.

I will jia you and press on. I will not fail anyone again.

Anyway, twin is having his final in Australia right. Wishing u all the best twiny!!! =D Ganbette!!!

I got to go to bed le.. Cant keep my eyes open any further le.

Night people..

PS: thanks for all the concerns from u people. I will try my best to believe more in myself. =D

Silence ;

Today bxb was all about 禅定. How I wish I can just integrate that into my life and into myself?

Anyway, today while I was travel back to jurong from toa payoh, it strikes me on how distant I am from people around me. Even though people see me being very close to all my buddies and best friends around me, but somehow I feel a barrier between myself and them. It is like I'm unable to blend in with them. It feels as if I'm a lone rock in the middle of a river. Friends around me just blend with each others and I'm left standing there alone. Although there are constant companionship, however the feeling of loneliness dun seem to crease.

I know I have a very wonderful girlfriend, Bro and buddies. But the feeling of loneliness is still there. I kinda feel insecure.. I want with desperation to blend with everyone and to try my best to help them, however, at the same time, I'm afraid of losing them.

I'm afraid that my constant care and concern for them will become something that causes me to lose them. On the other hand, I just cant stop myself from caring for them; from giving them a hand and a few words of encouragement.

That bring me back to my first statement at the beginning of this post. If only I can 禅定, I would not be feeling this way ba..

Silence ;

Finally get to go home today after the madness of mid term frenzy..

So happy to see mum and sister today.. =D

Nothing brighten my day other den seeing the ones I love smiling at me and giving me all the support i need. Spoke a lot to mum today.. It is really nice to be able to chat with her. Kinda miss whenever I could not go home due to school stuffs.

Today would be even better if I could have taken dinner at home with her. But unfortunately, mum added some non-veggie stock in her vege dishes,. I dun really want to tell her about it coz i dun want her to be upset again. So end up, I have to find an excuse by telling her that I'm full and dun feel like having dinner.

Sometime, I kinda hate myself, coz I can't even have a proper meal with my mum. If only I could convince mummy abt the goodness of being a vegetarian. Really hate it when I dun have enough wisdom to settle this kind of issue.

I still hoping for the day of acceptance to come. LMCB, hope it come soon. If not, my perfect day would only end up being inperfect.

Can I just gain wisdom instantly just like the way my game character does in the game with a simple wisdom buff? haiz.. =(

good night people.. Please do treasure all the times u have with ur parents and ur family.. Dun be like me.. I think I'm just a failure case ba..

Silence ;

The last mid term for this wave has finally passed.. I have already gotten some of my result back. Only have to say that gan en LM for her blessing, that I'm able to do well for the papers have gotten back. I would say the results for my mid this time round was alot better compared to the past. =D

It is really mysterious on how everyone around me are being brought together. I'm grateful for meeting every single one of u people out there.. Coz u have always been supporting me whenever i'm going through my darkest period or when i need motivation to get going again.

All I can say now is GAN EN and Thank you!!! Nothing is possible for me if LM and all of u are not around me or next to me.. xxcb!!!

I will try my best to be there for all of u.. I promise.. =D

Silence ;

WHOO!!!! It is really a blast to keep having mid terms last week and this week.. Have been hitting on my books and notes for 3 consecutive weeks. Nv felt so hard working b4. LOL!!

For these few weeks, I must really thanks bro for his constant encouragement; Miaosi for her love and for her 细心, Zhong Hong, Zhong Yu and TZ and FTZ for their wonderful company and wonderful dinners whenever I popped over to their house to study. Felt really blessed and loved!! =D

Lastly I must gan en my mum for her encouraging sms and LM for her constant support whenever I dont have the strength to continue studying or when i feel really tired. 感恩慈悲！！

Tml marks the last mid for this mid terms spree period!! I will persevere till the end of it!! =D

JIA YOU!!!

Silence ;